Posts Tagged wellness

Love Thyself First

Dr. Martha’s Monday Morning Motivational

Monday, July 18, 2011

Buddha said, “You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” The question is not should you love yourself but do you love yourself? I am not speaking of a vain, self-righteous, selfish love but rather a love of self-acceptance and understanding.

Loving yourself isn’t easy, about four years ago it was brought to my awareness that I didn’t really love myself.  Looking in the mirror and realizing I couldn’t say, “ I love you” to the person staring back at me was an eye opener.  I came to the realization like many that I didn’t really know myself enough to love myself.  It has been a constant journey and much like life it is a journey that continues as long as our breath continues. Learning to love myself has allowed me to in turn truly love others.

When you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you see a person created in God’s perfect image or a myriad of imperfections? To fully love oneself means to have self-respect, a positive self-image, and unconditional self-acceptance.   Loving yourself without reservation or saying “I love myself, but…” It is important to realize every person, bears their own unique characteristics and qualities.  We all vary in talent and ability. No one is perfect and it is those imperfections that make us an individual.  It is important that we know that we all have the ability to work on ourselves and are never done evolving into a better version of ourselves.

In order to love yourself more you must understand yourself more.  Just as in a relationship, getting to know someone allows you to better understand that person and from that understanding comes a greater level of acceptance. Start by realizing you are human and that you have the potential and capability to rise above anything that gets in your way.   It is important that you look and feel your best and to do so you must take care all aspects of yourself: physically, emotionally, and chemically.  You must love yourself enough to want the best for yourself in all areas and not just in a specific area.  Everything in life is about balance and moderation.

Physically, make sure you stay active by exercising and moving about.  Motion is life, making exercise a key aspect of longevity.  Chemically, we are organic beings and not chemical beings, make sure you eat proper foods and take in adequate water.  Remember food is fuel.  Emotionally, take time for yourself and just be still, continually learn, and meditate or pray and listen to God’s sweet voice.  All three aspects are important to maintain an overall level of wellness that creates life’s balance.  Chiropractic is awesome as it maintains nervous system function and addresses all three areas.  It has been an integral part in my journey to love myself for who I was created.

Loving yourself is a crucial foundation for all your relationships, because in order to love another you must first love yourself.  It is impossible to love another more than you love yourself, therefore loving yourself sets the standard for loving others.  By loving yourself more you actually have more love for others and the world needs more love.  So go ahead fall in love with yourself.

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” –Dr. Seuss

Love. Laugh. Adjust.

Dr. Martha Nessler, Innate Girl

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Wake Up the Wellness Alarm Clock is Ringing

Monday, June 20, 2011

Dr. Martha’s Monday Morning Motivational

I have decided that I am not weird or normal. Rather I am awake.  On my plane ride to EPOC Omaha I got into an in depth discussion with the two gentlemen, Phil and William, in my row.  They were both at two different places, Phil was newly diagnosed with Celiac and wanting to get into wellness and William was under chiropractic care and living the wellness lifestyle. We had an awesome conversation for the short 1-hour flight. Toward the end of conversation William told me that he loves meeting people who lives a lifestyle similar to his. I told him I wrote a bog about this exact topic where I questioned if a wellness lifestyle was really weird or was it normal.  He responded it’s neither; we are just awake.  I immediately wrote it down and told him that is exactly what we are.  We are awake.

Dictionary.com defines awake as to “wake up, to rouse up, and to come or bring to an awareness; become cognizant.”  As an example it states: “she awoke to the realities of life”.  Wow, to awake to the realities of life.  I know that is what I did.  What many may not know is that I was raised in the medical model.  I thought being sick was normal and that drugs and surgery were a must.  Honestly until I entered chiropractic school and met my boyfriend at the time I thought people who lived the current chiropractic and wellness lifestyle I live were weird.

I can honestly say that my ex-boyfriend woke me up! Very few people will say a positive thing about an ex let alone acknowledge them for waking them up to the power of wellness and chiropractic.  I can remember meeting Ryan when he was an intern and I was his patient.  During our visits he would question the medical paradigm I was under and the medi-practor belief system I had about chiropractic.  We definitely did not see eye to eye. Once he released me from his care and we started dating he began to educate me and inundate me with information.  Truthfully I thought he was crazy but cute and an amazing person. So, I began to try to see his points and began to educate myself. Throughout the years we dated I learned so much and I can honestly say I am the chiropractor I am today because of Ryan and his love of chiropractic.

Before meeting Ryan I was asleep.  Dictionary.com defines asleep as “in or into a state of sleep, into a dormant or inactive state; to rest, into the state of death”.  Wow, into the state of death! Exactly where I was headed.  I was on multiple antacids, taking a combination of prescription, over the counter, and Rolaids to get by all under the direction of my medical doctor. Year after year I was getting sicker and sicker and told that the goal was to stave off surgery for the multiple ulcers for as long as possible.  And that is exactly what happened from about twelve to twenty-one.  At 21 years old I woke up.  And thank God, sickness is not exactly the slumber that allows one to rest and heal as sleep is meant to do.

Since William Merrill reminded me I am not weird I am awake I have been looking around and a lot of people are sleeping.  Sleep walking, which makes it even more dangerous.  I got my wake up call in 2002 when I met Ryan.  I am so thankful that he shared the story with me and held my hand as I transitioned from my deep sleep and slowly gained back my life. I am forever grateful that he woke me up. The majority of the world needs a wake up call.  Their alarm has been ringing but comfortable in their sleepy state they keep hitting the snooze button.  Just like hitting the snooze button can make you late for work or cause you to miss a ride the same holds true in the terms of health.  Staying in the comfortable slumber of the medical paradigm may hold you back from living your life or even worse end your life.  It’s time to wake up there is a life out there worth living and your loved ones want to experience it with you!

Love. Laugh. Adjust.

Dr. Martha Nessler, Innate Girl

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Weird vs. Normal: Where Do You Fall?

Monday, June 13, 2011

Dr. Martha’s Monday Morning Motivational

Define weird.  I am becoming more and more confused about the word weird and what it means.  I also am unclear as to whether or not I want to be called weird. I am not really sure that I am the weird one.   More and more I am thinking that weird should be the new “normal” and I may just be ok with being weird.   Bottom line I believe that “weird” is really normal.

I love my life and I want to live it full out. I always say that I want to fulfill my purpose and live out my journey rather than have to stop my journey because I am unable to fulfill my purpose.  In other words, I want to be healthy, wealthy, agile, and surrounded by people I love.  It sure beats the alternative: old, crippled, broke, and alone! My wants define my daily actions.  Wanting to be healthy, wealthy, agile, and surrounded by loving like-minded people while I live my life full out means that I need to defy the social “norm”. To get different results you have to do things differently.

It has been said that doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results equates to being insane.  Our society is clearly insane. It has been proven that working out increases your overall wellness, decreases your chances of heart disease, elevates your mood, and prolongs your life.  Yet, people remain sedentary? It has been proven that a diet high in fruits & vegetables, lean meats, nuts, and healthy fats is the appropriate fuel to run the human body at full capacity.  Yet, people eat processed foods and ignore the negative affects of the chemicals in these foods? Pharmaceuticals are constantly being pulled off the market for their horrible side effects, causing death, and manifesting more symptoms.  Yet, people continue to believe that the newest pill is the magic pill? Water increases our metabolism, rids our body of toxins, and hydrates our cells; it is vital for life.  Yet, people ignore water to quench their thirst with a soda full of chemicals? Artificial sweeteners are neuro toxins and cause cancer and diabetes, and paralyze the belly of the muscle while poisoning EVERY cell in the human body.  Yet, people say they have to have one because they are addicted, yeah they are; they are chemically addicted.  Vaccines have numerous side effects that range from autism to weakened immune system to paralysis to death.  Yet, out of fear people continue to get these poisons injected into them without even knowing why? The list goes on and to me it is all so weird but in today’s society it appears to be normal.

I have a different definition of normal.  I define normal eating as consuming wide ranges of fruits and vegetables, eating healthy nuts and fats, lean meat for protein, and eliminating grains and dairy. So I follow this for my meal plans. Exercise is important, both aerobic and anaerobic, and I believe that movement creates life.  By working out I know I will increase my life expectancy, decrease dis-ease, and eliminate stress in my life and the feel good endorphins are great tool to stave off depression. So I work out 5 days a week. I know that I need water to increase my overall health, rid my body of toxins, and to hydrate my cells and alkaline water is even better.  So I drink half my body weight in ounces a day.  I believe in the power of positive thought and fully respect that my thoughts create my reality. So I do my best to remain in a positive frame of mind I know that we are not chemical beings and that drugs alter my natural state.  I cringe when I read the negative side effects and have no desire to make one symptom leave and replace it with another.  I know that humans are self -healing and that a balanced nervous system equates to a system free of dis-ease.  I know that dis-ease leads to disease so my chiropractor checks me once a week. I know the power of chiropractic so I get adjusted.   The combination of all the above provides the recipe necessary to live an optimal life.  To me this is normal and to others I appear to be weird.

Weird vs. normal, much like life it is how you look at it.  So, what am I? I’m me and I plan on living my life full out and enjoying every minute of it.  I want to make the most of my journey and make memories along the way.  I want to be pain free, healthy, wealthy, peaceful and in the company of great friends.  And most of all I want to bless others and share my love of life and my knowledge of wellness and if I get called weird along the way so be it! Weird or not you only get one life, live it full out.

Love. Laugh. Adjust.

Dr. Martha Nessler

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Are You In A Relationship Triangle?

Dr. Martha’s Monday Morning Motivational

Monday, May 30, 2011

Are you in a relationship triangle? And no I don’t mean a confusing triangle involving you and two other people that is full of drama and question marks. I am speaking of a relationship triangle that involves you, the person you are in a relationship with, and the goals you have for your relationship.  I have used the relationship triangle since I was 16 years old, when I  used it to explain to my boyfriend at the time why we weren’t going to work; we simply had different goals and were headed in different directions.  I have used it many times and it has served me well.

Relationships come in many types with the most common being love, work, friendship, and family.  In every relationship the objective is to grow closer while the level of closeness varies the objective remains to move in a direction that creates a bond of trust and respect.  To facilitate the growth of relationships both parties have to be working toward the same set of goals that will allow the relationship to strengthen.  If both parties are not moving toward the same goals they move apart from each person because one person grows while the other remains idle, barely moves, or regresses. It’s inevitable if one person loses focus of the relationship that rather than growing closer the two parties begin to gain distance and their bond weakens. The relationship triangle is a great tool that allows you to facilitate growth in your relationships.  All you need is a pen, piece of paper, the person you are in a relationship with, and the goals of the relationship.

Draw a triangle, a perfect equilateral triangle.  In one lower corner write your name and draw an arrow pointing up toward the tip of the triangle and do the same thing in the opposing corner with the other person in the relationship Now with that person begin to get clear on the goals of the relationship, clearly write them at the top of the triangle.  When both people are working toward the goals of the relationship then both begin to move closer to the tip and therefore closer together.  When someone begins to get lax or loses focus the two grow farther and farther apart.  The triangle is a great tool to facilitate growth.

I, personally, use the triangle in all my relationships and am now introducing it in to my practice.  The relationship triangle will allow me to help my practice members to clearly define and reach their goals and stay focused.  I place  “Dr. Martha and team” in one corner and the practice members name in the opposing.  At the tip I write out all their goals and ask them to get crystal clear on what exactly health looks like for them if they could have anything they want and what that looks like.   It allows them to clearly define their goals and to know what they are working toward.  The relationship triangle also keeps them accountable because at the top you also write your goals for them so they know exactly what you expect from them.  Expectation management is crucial in successful relationships keeping everyone on the same page and headed toward the same goal.  Giving your practice member a “map” such as the relationship triangle allows them to know where chiropractic is taking them and keeps them on track.  The relationship triangle is a great accountability for the chiropractor and the practice member.  My practice members are responding with enthusiasm and thanking me for the “map”.

Just as this triangle works in practice member-chiropractor relationships it works in all relationships allowing clarity, expectation management, and facilitating growth.  It is important to know where you are headed in any relationship.  I always say if you don’t know where you are headed, how do you know where you are going? The relationship triangle keeps everyone focused!

Love. Laugh. Adjust.

Dr. Martha Nessler, Innate Girl

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Your Genetics Are Not Your Destiny or Are They?

Dr. Martha’s Monday Morning Motivation

Monday, May 9, 2010

The majority of Americans let their genetics dictate their life.   They live with the misconception that because generations of their family who walked before them were sick and dying that they too are sick and dying.  They flood their mind with negative thoughts and they repeatedly say to themselves, limiting statements about their health, which hold them back.  The statements vary but are similar in outcome: “All males in my family have died by sixty”, “High blood pressure runs in my family”, “In my family we all have a problem with weight”, “All the women in my family get breast cancer”, and a multitude of other “standards” that individuals set for themselves.  The sad part is that these standards are limitations, which hold them back from the life they were entitled to live; all because they place all their bets on their genetics.

It’s important we understand the difference between genetics and epigenetics. Genetics deals with genes and heredity, that which is inherited from parent to offspring. Simply stated who we are comes from our ancestors, who they are makes us who we are, and their genetic history is a window into our future in terms of health.  I am not denying that our genes play a role in who we are and where we are headed. Instead I am encouraging that we begin to understand epigentics and the impact it can have our health.

Epigenetics implies that we can alter our genetics through lifestyle choices because our gene expression can be altered via changes outside our DNA sequence.  Because we can make alterations in our genetics, we can rest easy because our DNA does not have to dictate our destiny. The ability to alter our DNA and depends on the lifestyle choices we make.

Each and every day we make choices that alter our genetic make-up both positive and negative and most are directly related to that which we have learned from our MFTP (our mother, father, teachers, and preachers).  Our MFTPs are with us from our earliest days guiding us and educating us, they are our role models throughout childhood and adolescence. Their lifestyle choices have a huge impact on the lifestyle choices that we make, they set the guidelines to which we follow.

When looking at the health of our parents, our grandparents, our great grand parents and so on; it is important that we also look at the path that lead them to their destination and compare it to your current path.  Most people would be shocked to see how parallel their lifestyle runs to that of their family, therefore the similarity in their level of health is no surprise.

In order to move more towards health we need to make choices that catapult us in that direction rather than making choices that inhibit our progression toward wellness and anchor us to our genes.  Positive choices that facilitate health must be made in the foods we eat, proper movement, positive thought, and preservation of our nervous system, which controls every cell in our body.  Tracing back through negative choices you will see similarity in that of your MFTP.  If they ate processed foods you most likely do to and if channel surfing was their exercise the same most likely rings true for you.  Do you bombard yourself with negative thoughts? That is most likely how you were taught to think? If your parents believed that you slowly break down until you die then most likely you don’t believe that you were destined for an optimal life.

Believe me I am no exception to this rule.  I was raised within the medical paradigm too, which has become the American standard, but I am here to tell you that you can make the shift necessary to alter your genetics.  I have and while it has been a long road it has been a road worth traveling and a journey I continue each and every day.  The beauty of choices are that they are choices, choices that you get to make.  So what will you choose?

And remember you are not only choosing for yourself but for your offspring and theirs.  Make a shift today not only for yourself but for those whose lives you will bring into this world.

Love.  Laugh.  Adjust.
Dr. Martha Nessler, Innate Girl

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Why Settle For Good? When There’s GREAT.

Dr. Martha’s Monday Morning Motivational

Monday, April 25, 2011

Why Settle For Good? When There’s GREAT.

The book, Good to Great by Collins, is one of my favorite books.  Not only is it an easy and enjoyable read, but also its message is simple yet powerful.  The book teaches us that good is the enemy of great and with even the simplest of changes we are able to go from good to great.  While, Good to Great is a business book; the book is applicable to life.  If you lead a life of purpose and a passion most likely your business is a HUGE part of who you are as an individual, intertwining life and business.

Like most people I want a great life in all aspects, well rounded so that all areas are equally balanced.  I’ve always been an achiever in all the aspects of life, wanting the best for my life, wanting a great life.  Dating back to grade school I always wanted to get the most of my education, social life, family relationships, and spiritual walk.  The same holds true today wanting a great life across the board and with aging I have added wanting a great life in the aspect of business and wellness.

There are times we look at others lives and say they have “a great life” but greatness is a personal experience relative to the individual.  The beauty of other’s opinions is just that that they are other people’s opinions.  I always appreciate when someone compliments my life but compliments don’t have to dictate that you have reached the top level for you, your successes and your level of greatness.   So many times we take a compliment as “stop” sign, telling us we have reached the level of greatness for any aspect of our life.  While we have only reached a level of greatness in another’s eyes, individually we must decide what a great life means to us.

Personally, I know that I have a good life and each day strive toward a great life. In my opinion a great life is not place you reach and become idle but rather something you constantly strive for because eventually great becomes a new version of good.  In order to never settle you must set the standard a bit higher.  Interestingly we transition from good to great and then great becomes a new level of good and we have to make the necessary shifts and set our standards to obtain a higher level of great.

Establish your version of great. Be specific and detailed, clearly defining what great looks like and feels like.  Set your goals and establish a path that will lead you to great. We all have the ability to have a great life; we just need to set our intentions and focus.  Greatness is available, wanting it is half the battle and creating the path is the other half.  Enjoy your journey from good to great and don’t let good old you back.  Here’s to us having a great life.

Love. Laugh. Adjust.
Dr. Martha Nesseler, Innate Girl

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When Death Becomes Life: How My Mom’s Death Became Our Life

When Death Becomes Life: How My Mom’s Death Became Our Life

In honor of Pamela Jean Murphy Nessler – April 19, 1982

When someone dies we are taught to say goodbye, mourn, and move on.  This has always confused me, how do you “move on” when someone has been such an integral part of your life.  I prefer to think of moving forward.

My entire life I have tried to gather bits and pieces of information on my mother in hopes of learning who she was and what she was like as a person.  Through my family and her friends I have been able to paint a picture of the person that she was and who she would be today.  I smile when I hear of her adventures and I cry when I am told stories of her sorrows.  I am especially touched when I find out that part of journeys were the same and even though we went through them at separate times in separate lives I feel a closeness to her that makes her feel alive for a moment in time.

I wasn’t always able to talk about my mom at my house.  It wasn’t something that my stepmother encouraged and it was something that was hard for my father.   It was a topic that was understood to be off limits although no one ever said it. When I was a child I didn’t understand why my dad didn’t want to talk about my mom but in aging has come wisdom and now I see that out of sight and out of mind somehow equates to less pain.  I have come to learn that death and the loss of a loved one is a very personal experience and each person must deal with the event in his or her own way.

Not speaking about my mother’s death meant I also knew very little about her life and that truthfully I had never dealt with her death.  When your mother dies at two years old everyone sort of assumes you don’t need to grieve.   They also assume you have no memories.  Neither one are true.

Personally, I have a few memories of my mother’s last days.  They were of the days she was in hospice, they are splotchy at best but they are all I have.  What I can say is that at two you see the world through rose-colored glasses so although my memories of her are of her in hospice and in the last days of her life they are not terrible memories.  I remember the excitement of the ride to go see her after four months away, her holding me and saying goodbye, and people smiling as I climbed in her suitcase by her hospital bed to say good-bye, her new robe was light green, and I remember being sad she was going to be with Jesus and we had just been re-united.  Across the board they are memories I treasure.  How do I remember at the age of two?  My family has always wondered but there were no cameras and as I said my mother’s death was something in my younger years we never discussed.  I’ve always had a good memory; I consider it God’s gift as it has served me well.

At the age of twenty-two, I finally came to the point where I began to deal with my mom’s death. It took great friends, amazing family, fantastic wine, and time.  By the age of twenty-six I was finally at a point where I was able to look at my mom’s death for what it really was and that was a catapult and not an anchor. Let me explain.  A catapult propels and an anchor holds you back.  All events in our lives have the ability to propel us or hold us back.  In my opinion it is more common that we allow what we consider “positive” events to propel us, and “negative” events to anchor us.

I have pledged to find the positive in all situations whether or not I “feel like it” because when your mother loses her life to cancer at twenty-nine and passes four months after her diagnosis you realize that life truly is too short and wasting time is exactly that wasting time.  Believe me its not always easy but it is always necessary.  The day I began to see my mom’s life and death as a catapult was the day that “we” began to live.

For me I believe people only die if we allow them, while they physically die their spirit can live with us for as long as we allow it to live.  For some allowing their loved ones spirit to live is too hard and is not something they can do and still live themselves and for others like me it allows them to truly live.  Choosing to live for us both has enhanced my life in many areas.

My mother lost her life at the age of twenty-nine and that is where her journey alone on this earth ended. After dealing with my mother’s death at 26, I decided that I would live my life for my mother and since that day my mother has been my “why”.  Her death is what drives me to educate the world about living a wellness lifestyle.  My mother did all things considered “healthy”.  She ate right, took vitamins, exercised, and was a peaceful fun loving person.  But, my mother never had her nervous system assessed; she had never been checked by a chiropractor. My “why” is strong and it is my hope that her death allows others to live. I want to make sure that everyone is given the opportunity to live their life full out and that they and their loved ones are not cut short of all this life has to offer.  In my heart, each person I educate takes a little piece of her spirit with them and through their life she too lives.

A small part of my mom’s journey is carried out through those I share my passion with but a huge part of her live through me and with me.  At twenty-nine, the age when she passed, I decided that I would live the rest of her life for her.  Each time I do something she wasn’t’ able to do, I do it for her, I do it for us.  I commemorated this decision on April 19th, 2010 by running the Boston Marathon and re-qualifying with my best time.  Since that day I have lived each day for us and that makes each day that much more special.

Death is hard and if we are not careful we anchor to the loss of a loved one and with their death a part of us dies. I have chosen to use my mother’s death as a catapult and have allowed her death to propel me into the life I was meant to live.  I have taken it a step farther and have chosen to live for us both by sharing her spirit and story with the world.  Through my mother’s death I have chosen to live and will continue to allow her spirit to live.

Love. Laugh. Adjust.

Dr. Martha Nessler, Innate Girl

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